Very Upset

You know what really upset you is when you try not to be a Bitch about little thinks but you can't always be perfect when you are a mother of 2 special children and and walking on pens and needles and egg shells all the time.. I do my very best to make everyone happy and I do it all no one will never know how hard it is until they actually walk in my shoes!!! They don't have to sit in doctor appts and hear these things about there children and know that there nothing to fix them. That is the way they was born and God blessed me two very special boys to rise a do my best to give them best life they can have. But I still get shit for issues I have no control over it hurts to know that it aired all over the place for others to put there opinions there. Yes Facebook is my central family and friendship basic and that is do that fact no online do my children have special needs I deal with my own set of medical Issues. Im in no way shape or form a Angel or a perfect person or perfect mother. I have never calmed that, Alot people take me totally different way and never really get to know me or my family and how it works in my world but until you do please keep your opinions to yourself. So the next time when you see or hear my child having a meltdown or anything or because maybe my youngest just had seizure and is screaming and crying because he is scared as hell what he just mentally and psychically went though... Do the a temp change from the littlest as coming in from a warm car to house and that very cold temp walk to house. set seizure off and could be having multi ones at a time. and my other son is having a meltdown because he scared to death to see his brother going though this and he can't so anything about. Just think what if i had to deal with that daily 365 days a year 24 hours a day.... It not easy at all so please think before you speak and maybe next time asking is there any way i can help you .. Because it really hurts a special needs mom to hear or get told anything negative about there parenting and there children no matter what the case is... That mother or father can' t stop it or do anything about and not any amount drugs are going to help it or stop any of it. and who wants a child drugged up all day everyday. What kind of childhood or life is that???? When that day your walking in my shoes or spend week in my world. Isn't as easy as to you think and you can really hurt person feelings by what you say before thinking. I just had to get this off my chest there just a lot things that been piling up on my me the pass few months this all needed to be said and out in the open..

Any yes Facebook is my family and friends network, I don't get to leave and do all I want and have freedom alot I have to think about the place I need to go and what kind of germs maybe there and could hurt or harm my boys do there immune systems.. Yes Im that mother scrubbing down the shopping cards in the stores for 20 minutes with baby wipes to make sure I wiped it clean as much as I can to make sure either my kids don't lick it or chew on it and get some kind germ form it that maybe there immune system can't deal with and could be simple as a cold that could turn into something huge for them to deal with and the worst fear of my life deady!!!!

These babies are my life they come out attached to me and there are attached to me rest life and they can't help that they have too.. I wish I could do something about that and let them go and do normal things and be a kid and not have to worry in the bad of my head did i wipe that down . Or did i make sure no one was sick where we was at...

All Im asking to please think before you speak. I would give you my heart or my right kidney bend over backwards for anyone... But I have a lot on my plate daily and there is times I tin to seem act like Im Totally Bitch Im now seriouly Im not.. 

Love you all

heart emoticonheart emoticonheart emoticon